This audiobog will give some examples of how people interpret what's said based on tone of voice more than content.
Has anyone in your family (like maybe your mom) ever said "hey, watch your tone of voice"?
And maybe you have no idea of what you did or said wrong but your mom "heard" something negative in your voice.
Think of the modern day "whatever". I'm really getting so I hate this word - and as a result of disliking it so much, I've been practicing different ways to say it so that it's NOT so passive aggressive.
In the doctor's office you're probably not happy, you're cold, sick (or you most likely wouldn't be there), tired, feeling vulnerable with your butt hanging out, etc etc...so, you're ready for a fight and you're ready to hear things the "wrong" way perhaps.
And the doctor maybe hasn't been having the best of days either (or perhaps is just trying to act and sound professional). So, the doc comes in, says "hi" but looks distracted and you're automatically on the defensive.
If he (or she) then says "what's going on with you", depending on how warm sounding the tone is, you might respond in different ways. But guess what, your response then leads to a similar response from the doctor etc etc etc...
Someone has to break the chain.
Terrie